Frigga and Freyr

Frigga 

Freyr

Mixed Media devotional pieces created by Jennifer McCarty of Cheeky Chic Designs.

April - Inguz - Motherhood

Today I had a plan to get a lot done on my business websites and blogs. I had a to-do list with several detailed lines on drafting blog posts, newsletters, prepping photos, and so on.
Like so often happens with best laid plans and intentions, it all went to hell first thing this morning. The to-do list didn't even have a chance.
I had a fight with my mother, which, some readers who know me know that is not unusual. My mother and I have a strained relationship that goes through waves of highs and lows, usually the highs look like normal mother-daughter relationships and the lows are...really low. We are entering a low and, as usual in a low, I'm not seeing a way out of it right now.
In the past, when this happens, I have a tendency to wallow in my anger like a pig in mud, a mud warmed by anger then cooling to a tepid depression. Enough of a metaphor?
This time, however, I have a baby boy who has already shown that he is very sensitive to momma's moods so I knew I couldn't harbor these emotions for long or bring him into my mud bath with me.
After a long talk with my husband and getting out my hurt feelings into tears and words, I kissed him and my baby, grabbed some fresh towels, and took a hot shower.
I scalded myself in the water, steaming up the whole bathroom. This is how I cleanse and think. It is the best place for me to meditate now that I have a baby (its the only time I'm alone right now). The steamy air clouds around me and I am transported through the mists into Fensalir.
I climbed the stone steps up to my lady's hall. I pass the pillars and enter the interior hall of stone and great beams of grey wood like the driftwood of the beginning of the worlds. Off to each side of me are dark archways that lead to other rooms and halls (part of me knows that one day I will explore these places but today is not that day).
Ahead of me is the raised dias on which my lady stands. At the bottom step is a handmaiden dressed in a blue dress with her brown hair intricately braided. She is spinning on a wheel that I do not recognize - something between my own spinning which that requires a chair and the kind that Ghandi used to use. I note its strangeness and will look into it later. My goal is up the steps.
I stop at the bottom step and lower my eyes. I request an audience with Frigga. She says nothing but I feel that I am welcome. I climb the steps.
At the top of the platform is a chair - a throne in its use but really little more than a great wooden chair, nothing fancy but sturdy and lovely in its simplicity. Frigga stands beside it with her back to me, facing a large hearth in which a low fire burns. Another handmaiden is here, this one dark blonde but in similar dress, and is prepping some sort of herbal mix in a ceramic pot at the hearth.
I tell Frigga of my struggles, my sadness, my anger and I ask her if I am in the wrong for feeling this way. It takes a moment before Frigga turns to me. She gives me a small smile, one of concern and care. She places her hands on my shoulders and suddenly I am wrapped in a warm cloak - blue with a white collar with blue embroidery. It is warm and luxurious and comforting beyond belief.
She tells me things I do not want to share here - these are private and wonderful and nurturing. I lock them in my heart for now.
Frigga invites me to stay as long as I like to contemplate her words. She then hands me a stone - a rune the side of my palm though oblong. On it is a rune I recognize but could not yet name - I am just starting on my rune journey.
I returned to my shower slowly, tears ran down my face and mingled in the cleansing hot water. I smile and let them fall until I cannot cry anymore. I then leave the shower and dry off.
I take time to braid my hair as best I can - it isnt very long yet. I dress in clothes I like. I hug and kiss on my son and make my husband something to eat. I feel lighter, I can breathe easily.
After I settle I look online for the rune:

Inguz
Resting, gestation, internal growth, expectation, time for oneself
A seed begging to grow. (as I write I notice I wanted to write beginning but instead I typed begging...there are no coincidences)
Today is the first day that was warm enough to go out in short sleeves.
I put my son in our wrap carrier and went outside. I watched my baby touch spruce branches with awe, ponder sounds of birds and cars up the hill at the road, peeped in the green house, and looked at the garden beds awaiting seeds and plants.

We will be spending the weekend working in the greenhouse and outside, preparing the garden.
I think about Inguz. It is a masculine rune connected with Freyr. In this case it is the action of that first growth - the start. It isn't the womb but the bursting forth of new life deep in the ground where it cannot yet be seen. It is a promise of the energy rising, reaching the sun-Sunna, and transformational power not only for itself but also for the animal or person-animal that eats it - nourishment magick.
I am in this stage and while I can only guess, the seed might feel some pain as it cracks open to the moisture of the ground and begins to put out a sprout and roots.
I am putting out roots here in Meadow Lakes. I have found a home and I will grow here, reaching for the sun and nourishing those around me, gaining nourishment from them.
The plant does not worry about nourishing the animal half a world away. It does not worry about nourishing those nearby. It focuses on reaching towards the sun, focuses on drinking deep, focuses on growing its seed and nurturing it. I will do the same.
This rune also references the inner-child. The inner-child that seeks not only acceptance but also a mother's pride. The inner-child that fears even after a decade, even after 5000 miles. The inner-child that now turns to a goddess who takes care of children left out in the cold by mothers past and now and carries them with her on the wild hunt - the same wild hunt that happens one night after my birthday.
In divination, a reverse or "negative" reading could mean movement without change. I reflect on how I am constantly in this cycle with my mother. Susun Weed in her book says life is a cycle and how we are always returning to these times in our life, these events, decisions, illnesses, and so on and how we learn something new. This isn't to be considered outside of health. This is part of health, part of us. She recommends acceptance and Nourishment - a word that keeps coming up for me. How can I nourish myself in this situation and time. What do I need for nourishment? What does a seed need to gestate?
Good soil - if the soil the seed started in isn't working, move it. I moved to Alaska and was brought to Meadow Lakes by a series of events.
Sunshine - a shining light, goals, hope, knowing that things can get better even in the valleys and tunnels of life. The silver lining - knowing that the valleys might be low but they are fertile and usually beautiful if one will only look around. Sure, they don't have the far seeing vistas of mountain tops but they have meadows - I will have to focus on seeing heaven in a wild flower.
Air to breathe. Pollution, negative thoughts, bad programming, and more.
Water - cleansing, renewing, life giving water. My son's smiles, my lover's arms. Scalding showers.
Inguz

Gebo and Frigga

The rune associated with Frigga is Berkana but today I wanted to focus on the relationship of Gebo with Frigga.

rune cloth by me
rune from my friend Aconita

Experience
If you're reading my blog, you probably know that this is almost entirely UPG (unverified personal gnosis) that is brought on by experiences I have with Frigga and her handmaidens as well as a few experiences I have with other gods and my husband has with other gods.
My experiences with Gebo was initially brought about with Frigga.

The first experience I had was right after Ironwood Witch, Ulfdis, gave me a reading regarding my being called into service by Frigga. I was not expecting a reading but I wanted to return the kindness and work so I asked Ulfdis if I could send her something in return for her divinatory aid. She said I could and reminded me that this act of Gebo is something I might be coming across more and more in this realm of Northern Paganism/Heathenry.

The second time I experienced Gebo with Frigga was when I was trying to negotiate a mandate Frigga had for me - within a year I am to stop giving tarot readings for pay. Frigga is a goddess of divination and a seer in her own right but she is one that is well known for not telling people or gods what she sees. The reason she didn't want me to offer readings for pay is 1) it cheapens my abilities in that people off the street can access divine aid and messages for simple coin and, because it is easily bought, they often blow off the advice given (this is something I see often as a tarot reader) and 2) it is not a form of divination that she is particularly fond of turns out.
So I was negotiating with her regarding divination because I love divination and reading tarot is a huge part of my life and business. I won't go into all the details of our negotiations but I will tell about its relationship to Gebo. Frigga mandated in part that I would learn to read the runes but that my first set of runes must be given to me in an act of Gebo and that I could, until she says otherwise, only read runes for others as an act of Gebo - a barter.
As I said before, my first set of runes were given to me in exchange for a custom crocheted tarot bag. This exchange happened very quickly after Frigga's mandate - the speed of which and the ease of the exchange I honestly feel is a testament to her showing me that she won't simply mandate or require things but will also aid in making it happen so long as I don't hesitate.

Speaking with Frigga

I thought I would write a clarification post by what I mean when Frigga and I have a conversation. Going to go ahead and say here, I expect some people to think I'm making this up or that I'm completely crazy - that's ok, I accept this and am trying my best not to be upset over any commentary regarding that. This post if for those of you, like me, who went looking for others who were also speaking with the gods. When Frigga came to me, I went looking and, thankfully, had a friend who connected me with others like myself. This made me feel less nuts and actually helped me to figure out where I was and what I needed to be doing. So, if you're in similar shoes, this post if for you.

Joshua Tenpenny writes on his blog, Serving Gods, a very clear post about having conversations with gods and how it works for him. I found his blog post comforting and inspiring and while I encourage you to go read the whole post, I wanted to share a key piece here:
If you are talking to someone who doesn’t believe all this, they want to know precisely what level of implausibility are you claiming...Basically, they want to know whether you are a Grade-A Nutter, or just someone who bizarrely chooses to interpret normal life situations in some kind of weird religious context.
From the standpoint of a hard polytheist, some people have waking visions and some people have subtle hints, and unless there is some other reason to question the validity or accuracy of the message, the means of communication are as irrelevant as whether Susan invited you to her birthday party in person, by email, on Facebook, or mailed you a physical invitation.

So here is the short clarification: 

I have had dreams and waking visions of Frigga wherein she is either here with me, like someone physical sitting beside me, or I am with her in Fensalir, walking through her hall or along the misty marsh and we talk.
For non-believers, this is the penultimate of bonkers and that is why I quickly looked for reference among others with similar experiences. Happily, I found some and even had a reading that assured me that this was what was actually happening and not something my brain was just misfiring and making up.

Is this the first time this has happened?

Yes and No. I have been in the presence of gods before, however, these situations were usually after deep meditation, a request for their presence, and usually after days, weeks, or even months of a certain spiritual practice connect with that deity.
I have had guardians and spirits contact me in this jolting and unexpected way but Frigga is the first goddess to contact me without my first initiating the contact.

How do I know its Frigga and Not Something Else?

This is a blog post all its own but...
I know its Frigga and not my own Higher Self or Ego because of 2 things - 1) she has requested a few actions and set in place a few taboos I'm not entirely comfortable with; nothing crazy or dangerous, just out of my comfort zone. 2) Someone who isn't emotionally connected to my situation did a reading and confirmed it was Frigga.
I know its Frigga and not a malicious entity because of 2 things - 1) I have experience with malicious entities and have my own system of vetting spirits that come to me. 2) see #2 above.

My Recommendations for Those Being Visited by the Divine?

1. Get a reading from a divination expert, shaman, or other spiritualist that you trust. These people will be able to vet your situation and tell you what their form of divination says as well as give a little bit of clarity on what the god or entity that is visiting you wants. 
2. Simply ask the god, spirit, or entity what they want. This is huge and if they are legit, they will answer. 
3. Remember, you have the right to stop communication or say no any time you want. Free will does exist and if you don't want this entity as part of your life, you can say so. If the entity does not leave, get a reading from an expert or consider taking steps to exorcise/banish the entity. Remember that the gods aren't all that interested in forcing someone to work with them - malicious entities however will linger while they can. 

Hulda's Blessing on a Tired Mother

I have recently been having a rough time going to sleep at night. When I lie down with my snuggly, sleeping boy, suddenly my brain is active with should-have-dones and need-to-dos. I also have been having issues with pains that I won't get into in detail but it does make it difficult to get comfortable.
Figuring I had nothing to lose for it, I asked Frigga to aid me in finding a rest after a days work if she saw fit.
I closed my eyes and a small vision came to me, helping me to relax.

I was standing in the foyer of a what was either a small cabin or the small kitchen of a larger hall. 

The room was dominated by a large stone hearth in which a fire was burning with warmth and light that washed over me. 

I looked down to see that I was minimally dressed in a thin night gown and in my arms was my sleeping child with a furrowed brow as if he knew I something was strange. 

We were not alone in the room. 

A middle-aged woman with a gold braid, light blue dress, and a gray shawl greeted me with a soft smile and a nod. 

by Lynn Perkins

This is Frigga as Hulda - the lady of the hearth and comforter of tired mothers. 

Normally I have been met with the Queenly Frigga, Wife of Odhinn and Mistress of Asgard so I was a little surprised at her meeting me in such an informal way. 

Hulda led me to the hearth and bade me sit on the rug there. That rug was more comfortable than any bed I have ever sat or slept on. It was thick and brown and I think made of goat or sheep wool or both. 

She then wrapped my son and I in a thick blue and white quilt - not unlike the one I sleep under normally. 

I curled up on the rug with my child and watched the flames of the fire. 

Hulda went to her spinning wheel nearby. 

The whir of the wheel and the tune she hummed was the sweetest lullaby. 

I looked down at my boy and the furrow in his brow was gone, his face serene as his little hand touched my face and wrapped around a loose strand of my hair. 

I closed my eyes and was soon fast asleep.

That night my son who is 4 months old only woke twice to nurse. We both woke with snuggles and smiles. I placed a pancake on Frigga's altar in thanks.

4 Pillars of Fensalir

As I went for a walk with Frigga, the mist surrounded us and I didn't see much other than her. She stood tall, so much taller than me that I had to look up to see her face when she turned in her strolling to look down at me. Her long white-blonde hair was perfectly coiffed in a soft bun with a silvery pin and her lean body was wrapped in a blue-silver dress with a white ruff around the shoulders. I am always stunned by her grace and how she seems to flow from step to step. My own movements are clunky and childish next to her.

I receive images instead of words sometimes. I always get the feeling that she is not fond of my language or that she would simply rather I use hers if I only could.
My son comes up, the darling grinning at me toothlessly. I tell her he is well, though I feel like this is simply chitchat and she likes to ask about him even when she already knows. I tell her he is still teething. I receive the images of the herb chamomile and nod, yes I've started to give him the tea.
I get the feeling this visit wasn't a social call, I'm not sure if Frigga even makes social calls.

Frigga informed me that there were 4 important tenents I was meant to keep and to teach to others that would hear. These are the 4 Pillars of Fensalir:

1. Kindness
2. Cleanliness
3. Charity
4. Hospitality

I asked why love of children and spouse was not included, as she is the Goddess of family, children, and marriage.
She turned to me and raised a brow, asking, "Do you need to be told to love your child and husband?"
"No," I responded, feeling a little ridiculous for having asked.
She shrugged as if to say "there you go."

Hospitality
Hospitality is an important act among the people of the North - and elsewhere in ancient days. For one reason, you never knew who you were welcoming into your home. There are many legends and fables of people welcoming a stranger only to learn later they were gods, elves, messengers of the gods, or angels. These creatures and gods, being more powerful than man, could either curse or bless a home so it was a big deal to be hospitable.
What might be a little ironic is, when it comes to this tenet, I often think of the Satanic 10 Commandments that tells its followers to be respectful and hospitable, however, if someone disrespects you in your home, destroy them. This is an important matter of hospitality that isn't often discussed - the guest honoring the home and those that live there. Hospitality goes both ways.
I have been in homes were I have been disrespected as a guest but, rather than fight the ones who lived there, I and those with me simply left the premises and did not return without receiving an apology and a welcome back (even then we did not go back quickly or linger long).
Frigga, as the Lady of Fensalir and the Queen wife of Odin, is well acquainted with hospitality and its effects on everyone involved. She welcomes guests to her own marshlands as well as to the great halls of Asgard. She has also used the rules of hospitality to have her way - in the case of Odin (in disguise) visiting King Geirröðr.
Another part of hospitality, she informed me, is to ALWAYS accept gifts when given. I feel that this might be more directed at me than anyone I might be talking or writing to but I felt the need to share anyways. I have a habit of, when someone wants to give me a gift, of saying things like "you shouldn't have" and getting embarrassed if I have nothing to give them in return. This is, of course, the true nature of gift giving - to give without expectation. The gifts can be non-physical items even, such as a friend buying me lunch or even a simple compliments. I am still learning to receive without diminishing myself or making the person giving insist that I take it.

Cleanliness
If you have worked with Frigga or read about her, you probably know she is a stickler for cleanliness. She likes a clean home especially, but also to make sure your personage is clean and your children are clean.
I need to hold onto this concept hard as I am not much of a house cleaner, I must admit. There are just so many things I would rather be doing in general, much less in the short time I have free from my little one - cleaning is just not something I enjoy doing. Frigga has no interest in this excuse from me and if I so much as pick up my crochet hook when the house is a mess, I am suddenly bombarded with "mom voice" in my head reminding me of that pile of laundry or that I haven't vacuumed in a week.
I'm reminded, with a giggle, of this image from a 1940's Singer sewing machine:

Cleanliness goes a step further with Frigga who is ever the lady of the home and this also means a lady of the hearth. Frigga is a fan of "real food." She turns up her nose at the idea of over-processed food-stuffs and would prefer a cleaner diet and cleaner body. This by no means includes "fat-free" or low calorie foods. She would have me drink whole or raw goat milk, bake and eat my own bread, and eat exclusively home raised or hunted meat if possible. This, to her, is clean living.

Kindness
The biggest point I want to get across is kindness does not mean being a door mat nor does it equate to the Wiccan rede of harm none. Kindness, at least here, means decency, courtesy, and good will (unless you have a reason, such as inhospitable people, not to be).
Frigga sees a lot of rudeness being very common in our lives and would like to encourage us, especially in our homes and personal lives, to be kinder to ourselves and each other. Pretty simple, at least in saying if not in practice.

Charity
It is said, if you have more than you need, build a larger table, not a higher wall.
Frigga has a big heart for charities that help women and children as well as charitable acts towards people in our lives.
I've put up a page here that lists a few organizations close to my heart and Frigga's. This page is still being developed. If you have any suggestions for organizations in this field (women, chuldren, mothers, fiber arts, and the faith) please let me know.

Gifts to Mother and Child

At the beginning of this week I learned about a woman who had her baby too early and both were in the hospital. I am not a particular fan of this woman - she has been very disrespectful to a friend of mine and to my goddaughter to the point of cussing and being vulgar to the latter (who is 12).
That being said, when I learned of her situation I did ask Frigga if she would watch over the baby and perhaps help the woman to be a better mother to this child than she has been to her other children (long story).

In northern fashion, Frigga's attitude was very much "what would you do for me in return?"
I asked what she wanted -
"Let me hold your son and caress his hair."
Knowing that Frigga would never hurt my son, I agreed, however, that wasn't the end of it.
She said she would help them but I would have to do some work. She then gave me a glimpse (a brief vision) of what she needed me to make. We had a back and forth because the first vision - there was just no way for me to obtain those materials. Finally we settled on a piece that was doable...

I then argued that there was no way I would have time to create what she wanted AND get it to my friend who was taking things to this woman at the hospital. Frigga put her foot down so I figured I would get started on the project and simply do a little now and finish whenever.
My son had the LONGEST NAP he has ever had that day. Nearly 2 hours with brief interludes where he woke just enough to nurse then went right back to sleep. During this time I barely remember anything. I crocheted, fed and held my son, and I know I had a brief conversation with one of my in-laws but I don't remember the content of that conversation at all.

I finished both projects - the hat for the baby and the poppet carrier for the mother.
That evening, my husband created a birch goddess poppet that I then blessed with chamomile and the rune Berkana as directed by Frigga. My husband took both to my friend the next day to be delivered.