Thursday, August 25, 2016

Pagan Veiling Mention and Resources

Wanted to share a recent blog post from Danie at Primordial Willow on Pagan Veiling.
Danie has been a Veiling Pagan for several years and has graciously created a great resource list for us in light of the topic being stirred up recently. I was surprised to see my own Pinterest board on Pagan Veiling mentioned and linked here.

I also wrote a blog post over on my professional site about my thoughts on the recent Burkini controversy and its connections to public breastfeeding in the whole world of body autonomy and women's rights. The majority of the post is very pointed images and a discussion I had with some well-meaning but misguided liberal feminists desiring to save brainwashed women from oppression by belittling them.

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Heathen Community, Race, and Gender Constructs

The notorious AFA is at it again...

When I initially read this post on a friend Lee's feed (note, my friend shared an article that spoke out against racism in the Heathen community and this was the picture that showed up in the share that I reacted to) I wasn't sure what to say only that I was reeling from the bs I read.
Someone who is also friends with Lee replied to my response asking if I was "Triggered?" then "Why? Do you equate pride in one's heritage to be racist? Or only when white people do it?"
Before I comment on the topic of racism I want to share the last part of our conversation on Lee's feed:

Me Also, I'd like to add that MY statements had nothing initially to do with race, Dennis, yours did. What triggered me, in fact, was the statement about gender more than race. I find it interesting how triggered you seem. Not to try a stir things up but I did want to make it clear that i found this particular part of the commentary interesting.
Dennis There was a statement of gender in this particular discussion? I missed that. I thought this whole thread was about race. What did I miss?
Me "The AFA believe that gender is not a social construct" is a statement in the picture I commented on and the statement goes on. This was what I was initially responding to.
Lee Perfect example of such confusion. Thank you December for reflecting publicly on that piece - folks have been really embedded here in the discussion on race and racism, while you highlight that the AFA has *so* much more wrong going on.
Hugs.
Dennis I think this is totally a "Can't see the forest for the trees" moment. We got caught up so much with the racial aspect we totally missed the rest of the bullshit.

Now, I want to say that I do not think that Dennis was trolling me at all. I believe he was pushing me to respond intelligently and thoughtfully to my emotional response to the image above (or, as I'm sure now, to the article that was attached to the image which I had not read). This all happened last night and I have had some time to consider the entirety over some coffee and lack of sleep (my son still has a fever as I wrote about in my post about Ullr and we're still coping).

A Brief Note on Race and Heathen Community

I want to preface this commentary with I am NOT Folk Tradition Heathen. When I must label my belief system I say Northern Tradition Polytheist as this releases me from the ideas of Lore-based and those assumptions people have of the "Heathen" term. I am also a white American female and cannot pretend that this upbringing has not effected my thoughts when it comes to this topic. I speak from this standpoint and do not claim to understand every point of view in this discussion including the point of view of people of color that are Heathen.
I also want to note that I do not know my cultural background. I am working on my genealogy as part of my ancestor work but there is a lot missing and I cannot say if there is any connection to Northern Europe at all in my bloodline.

With those caveats, I do not believe that race or skin color (note the distinction) should have anything at all to do with religious beliefs. If someone who is white or black, Asian or German or Icelandic in descent is called by the Norse Gods, who am I to say they are the wrong choice? Who are we to question the Gods?
I was asked if I had a problem with people honoring their white ancestors. No.
Honoring the ancestors should not be stigmatized by skin color.
Here again, I want to differentiate between Race and Skin Color. Race, to me, has to do with the cultures and tribes we come from and this did not have to do with skin color for our ancestors. This focus on Race and Not Skin Color can be seen in America during the NINA (No Irish Need Apply) laws and the discrimination against any Immigrants including European ones the disdain for Jews in America even after WWII. These people were not discriminated against regarding the mellanin in their skin but their Race.

Honoring the ancestors does not equate to a specific religion or group of Deities or community.
Many people of many race, skin color, and religion honor their ancestors so I don't see how it can be a matter of debate and how it can be considered discriminatory to honor your ancestors within your religious community.

Now, for a religion community to focus on and revere a group for their skin color above people of other skin colors - this is where things get discriminatory and hinky. I do see how people can be upset about the above picture focusing on the "white children" within Heathenry and be upset, especially given our political atmosphere right now.
Yes, White children are Beautiful as are Black children and Asian children and Latinx children. The focus on white families and children or any specific skin color within a religious group is, in my opinion, inappropriate and counter-productive.

Heathens, Pagans, and Gender Constructs

So here is where I was initially focused when it comes to the image above.

"The AFA would like to make it clear that we believe gender is not a social construct, it is a beautiful gift from the holy powers and from our ancestors. The AFA celebrates our feminine ladies, our masculine gentlemen..."

This is what I took issue with.
Do these people even read the stories regarding the Gods they supposedly serve?
Loki (note not the most popular among many Heathens who regard this mischievous God as a sort of Norse Satan and I know some will be like "well of course thats just Loki) crosses the gender boundary by becoming a mare and giving birth to Sleipnir.
Odin himself also crosses the gender barrier when he practices the craft of seidr which is the realm of women and is called out for it in Lokasenna and does not deny it. Here is the King of the Gods, the All-Father, who has no issues with femininity or becoming a woman for a time in order to gain knowledge.

If not the gods then perhaps they hold to Heathenry for its past culture and history, in which I feel they are still ignorant.
What of the women in the battle fields who were described using some of the same adjectives men were described with such as dregilingr.
Many look at the lore and point out that for a man to be called womanly or feminine was an insult while others point out that these conversations were written by Christians after the fact and thus colored by Christians Patriarchal temperament. I cannot say who is right here only that I question a community who holds this, rather than the religious aspects of their community as the mark of how to behave. Do Heathen women that hold to the AFA's attitude view being feminine and a woman to be lowly? If not, then why condone that mentality and encourage this mind-set.
One can also bring on the conversation of why do so many within the Heathen culture promote this concept of a masculine, warrior woman but down play the effeminate wives and mothers of the home? That's a conversation for another day...

Why Does It Matter?

Some ask why bother responding to drivel like that spewed by the AFA? Why not just ignore it so it will go away much like the statement of "don't feed the rolls"?

1) I personally think its important as a Pagan, Polytheist, and follower of Norse traditions to state that the AFA, Heathen Women, and similar groups who promote prejudice and ignorance do not have beliefs embraced by all of us. I think its important to say this so that people drawn in by our gods don't fear these traditions because of hate speech in the minority.
2) We should always be questioning and challenging ourselves to be better and worthy of our Gods and Ancestors. How else can we do that if we are unwilling to respond to potential catalysts for growth?
We are "Future Ancestors" and our actions and words should strengthen our religions and traditions for our children.

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Meeting Ullr

My son is running a fever. I believe its in connection to teething as he might be getting one of his eye teeth (K9 teeth) earlier than expected and they "stomach teeth" as my family calls them, tend to be the most problematic with teething symptoms such as fevers and diarrhea. I share this because I am stressed out about it. My son, other than the little bit of colic during his first weeks, hasn't been sick and I'm always wondering if this is a bad thing for his immune system. Now that he has a fever I'm blending my natural remedies with allopathic medicines my relatives press upon me along with prayer and energy healing.
I've asked Frigga for aid as she is not only My Lady but also the Goddess of mothers and children. I go to her for this sort of thing rather than Eir who I see more as the healer of wounds and the nurse at the battle field.
When I went to Frigga she gave me comfort and my son but also said that I should not worry, that he was protected. I assumed she meant by her.
When I came back down from Fensalir, I meditated while nursing my son and allowed myself to journey to my own astral spaces where I can keep calm, tether myself when journeying, etc. In one of these spaces in an anchor I created when I was pregnant for a shield for my son. Here I can tend to his shielding and care and it is usually a smallish, dark space dominated by the egg that is my son and his shield for his energy body.
I was stunned when I entered this space to find my darling egg was not alone. I do not even allow my husband here. This place is sacred and, to me, like a womb. To find someone within was startling and put me in a predatory, protective mind-set I don't know that I've felt before.
There, beside my son was a man kneeling. He held onto a pole like a staff only thin, and was dressed in furs. Over his long, wind-swept, dark hair he wore a cap and I could not readily make out a face through his dark beard.
I know I said something along the lines of "how dare you be here" and demanded he tell me who he is and what he wanted while at the same time determined to make him leave. When he looked up I knew he wasn't human. I wondered a moment if he was Odin, my husband's Patron deity, who I would have understood somewhat being present as my husband too is worried about our son.
I knew, as soon as I had the thought, however, that I was wrong.
The God grew and grew. His hands were massive and he stood so tall I had to crane my head back to see him. I asked again, frightened this time, who he was.
Ullr
He then turned and left.
Shaken I tended to my son and wondered where I had heard the name before.

Boksta Runestone
My research on Ullr came up successful in that he does exist and others work with him but scant as to why on hearth he would be watching over my son.
Ullr is the god most known for skiing and archery as well as winter.
Some believe, due to archaeological finds and traces, that Ullr might actually be older than the gods. It is likely that his "mask" or aspect that we know of now is one developed over time and he has evolved from something much more primal such as a god of winter, darkness, even death.
While lore says he is the son of Sif and could have connections to Thor, Egill, and Svipdag, others feel these might be the faint reachings of Christians trying to place a God they otherwise can't wrap around.
He is also a god of oaths and his oaths are ones made over rings.

None of the above explains a connection to my son who is Autumn-born and too young for winter activities much less hunting. I then wondered if he was there to speak to me as I am both a child of winter and an amateur archer married to an adept hunting archer and my protective instinct warded him off before we could connect.
I do intend to attempt a connection again when I have more energy. For now I am recuperating after little sleep and much stressing over my wee one.

Ullr's Shrine

Monday, August 22, 2016

Divine Sex: Intimacy with Gods

This is a topic that I've avoided, struggled with, and hid away for a while now. I kept quiet about it because I know full well the majority of the people I know, even the Pagans, Heathens, and Witches that I associate with, will think I am crazy or desperately seeking attention. I know this because I've seen how the community response to others who have said "I have/have had sex with a god." I've seen them called attention-seekers, drama queens, wanting to look special, and "crazy as shithouse rats" (that last one was the most recent statement within the local Heathen community regarding godspouses).

So here I am, dealing with my insecurities and writing despite being outright uncomfortable. Why am I putting myself through this?
As with most of what I write whether its on religion, parenting, or even my works of fiction - I write because this is what I have looked for in the past. I sought out information about those who have relations with the gods and, thanks to my dear friend Lee Harrington, was pointed in the right direction. I read voraciously but I didn't find any resources detailing exactly what I was going through. So I returned to the advice I was given in writing class - write what you want to read.
Cupid & Psyche by Rodin
My first intimate experience with a god was in 2012. I was in a phase of wanting to "collect" attunements. This sometimes happens with people after they receive their first attunement (for me it was in Reiki) and they become almost addicted to the feeling. I then got attuned to Sekhem, then Sekhmet Sekhem, etc. During this collection I was offered a free Anubis Energy Attunement. I accepted it without a moment's hesitation.
At the time I worked predominantly in the nude before a candle-lit altar (all mystical sounding of course...I was dramatic then). I had a very strong experience with the attunement in which I was sitting before Anpu who was holding me by the shoulders while Dehuti (Thoth) was behind me tattooing symbols into my back with a stylus. After the attunement was finished, I felt buzzy and tired at the same time but nothing was abnormal. I grounded, ate some dinner with my husband, and went to bed.
That night I was visited by Anpu who was forceful and intimate. While I wasn't asked for consent, I didn't feel violated, only overwhelmed by the whole experience. When I woke, I was dazed. I told my husband and searched online for other who had the experience - found nothing. The few people I asked about it assumed it was "just a dream" and probably meant to be taken symbolically. Others said that it probably meant that Anpu was my patron deity and meant to work with. Neither of these explanations felt true to me. I felt alone and a little crazy.

My path winded down the spiral and my beliefs shifted and transformed. I became a handmaiden of Frigga who I turn to when I have questions now. While my first experience wasn't forgotten, it became like many things that have happened to me in my religious life - an entry in my book of shadows to contemplate if/when I needed to.
Mani by V.E. Hardy

Then I asked Frigga about the moon. I wanted to write for a publication regarding the moon, specifically about how some cultures view the moon as masculine and others see it as feminine. Like many of the Norse gods, there wasn't much written on the moon god Mani and so I went to Frigga.
Frigga sat spinning the ancient runes and magic into the life of Midgard, smiling knowingly at me with a nod as I asked her. She then sent me, with few words, to Mani himself.

When I went to him, he was very gentle and very affectionate. This became my second encounter with a god that was sexual without any warning or intention on my part.
With Anpu I had been...for lack of better phrasing...rode hard and put up wet. I woke groggy and felt unnerved. With Mani it was completely different. I slept soundly and woke rested and could still feel his gentle caress on my neck and face.
However, after all was said and done, I felt both enlightened and confused.

My husband offered an explanation - that by being intimate with me, he was fully sharing himself so that I could have a better idea of who he was than any conversation or reading could give me - that this was a way the gods can convey information and teachings.
I think this makes sense but also find it strange that even though I am bisexual, I've only ever had these experiences with masculine deities.

I emailed modern polytheist expert Galina Krasskova about my questions. I was nervous about emailing someone I didn't know and look up to as a pagan and author but I felt like if I was going to ask someone, it was best to ask someone who knew what they were talking about.

My biggest question was about the fact that in both cases of this happening to me, I didn't get any sort of consent question before hand or really any warning. Was this just the gods taking what they wanted or felt they deserved as gods?
Galina answered very succinctly:
"Consent is given, imo, when you approach the Gods. it's not like you're going to a frat party after al where a higher, holy Power is expected to ask at each step if this is ok. It doesn't work that way. had you said "Stop" I suspect Mani would have done."
This felt very true and made sense to me. I was glad I asked.

Friday, August 19, 2016

30 Days of Deity

I saw this on Galina Krasskova's Blog, which she got from Felix Culpa's Tumbler and I wanted to share here. I intend to do this for Frigga and will be contemplating my answers until Sept 1 when I put up my first post. I thought about waiting until December or January but I wanted to do this now and might revisit the meme again for one of Frigga's handmaidens or another god/dess later on.

  1. A basic introduction of the deity
  2. How did you become first aware of this deity?
  3. Symbols and icons of this deity
  4. A favorite myth or myths of this deity
  5. Members of the family – genealogical connections
  6. Other related deities and entities associated with this deity
  7. Names and epithets
  8. Variations on this deity (aspects, regional forms, etc.)
  9. Common mistakes about this deity
  10. Offerings – historical and UPG
  11. Festivals, days, and times sacred to this deity
  12. Places associated with this deity and their worship
  13. What modern cultural issues are closest to this deity’s heart?
  14. Has worship of this deity changed in modern times?
  15. Any mundane practices that are associated with this deity?
  16. How do you think this deity represents the values of their pantheon and cultural origins?
  17. How does this deity relate to other gods and other pantheons?
  18. How does this deity stand in terms of gender and sexuality? (historical and/or UPG)
  19. What quality or qualities of this god do you most admire? What quality or qualities of them do you find the most troubling?
  20. Art that reminds you of this deity
  21. Music that makes you think of this deity
  22. A quote, a poem, or piece of writing that you think this deity resonates strongly with
  23. Your own composition – a piece of writing about or for this deity
  24. A time when this deity has helped you
  25. A time when this deity has refused to help
  26. How has your relationship with this deity changed over time?
  27. Worst misconception about this deity that you have encountered
  28. Something you wish you knew about this deity but don’t currently
  29. Any interesting or unusual UPG to share?
  30. Any suggestions for others just starting to learn about this deity?

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

35 Adorations to Frigga

35 Adorations to Frigga
Frigga by Samantha Johnson
I adore you, All-Mother
I adore you, Queen of Asgard
I adore you, Lady of Fensalir
I adore you, Daughter of Fjorgynn
I adore you, Leader of Handmaidens
I adore you, Hlidskialf Enthroned
I adore you, Key-Bearer
I adore you, Heron-Crowned
I adore you, Gold-Girdled
I adore you, Beloved Lady of the Aesir
I adore you, Head of the Home
I adore you, Patroness of Marriage
I adore you, Grieving Mother
I adore you, Solicitor of Oaths
I adore you, Harrowed by Mistletoe
I adore you, Wielder of the Distaff
I adore you, Cloud-Spinner
I adore you, Wyrd-Weaver
I adore you, Divine Midwife
I adore you, Bearer of Berkana
I adore you, Lady of Silver Birches
I adore you, Frith-keeper
I adore you, Domestic Goddess
I adore you, Guardian of the Hearth
I adore you, Bearer of the Mead of Hospitality
I adore you, Protectress of families
I adore you, Comforter of children
I adore you, Keeper of Odin's secrets
I adore you, Silent Seer
I adore you, Patient Partner of a Wanderer
I adore you, She who soothes the wandering king
I adore you, cunning Wife and warrior in the battle of words.
I adore you, Lady of the Langobards
I adore you, One who smiles on the lowly
I adore you, Throne-Guardian alongside brothers

You can find this and more writings about and to Frigga at the Northern Pagan Tradition Shrine.

Monday, August 15, 2016

Prayer for Freya

Galina Krasskova is currently hosting a contest for a new Freya prayer card.
Freya by Halldora

If anyone is interested Galina will run this contest for one week. It will end 9pm EST on Monday, August 22. Check out the blog for entry requirements and contest winner awards.

My Entry:

Hail Freya, Vanadis
I ask for protection, under your falcon wings and war-maiden's shield
Help me to make peace among my enemies
Give me the courage to fight again for if I am battle-slain in truth
May my actions be ever-worthy of your choosing.

Hail Freya, Lady of Sessrúmnir
Help me to set boundaries for myself so I can honor the boundaries of others
For as your home when locked is protected by your will
Let me be also protected and closed against trespasses. 
Yet may my hospitality be true and help me act in frith.
Help me to pay fairly and to accept fairly what is my due
Show me your just ways.

Hail Seidhkona, Holder of Magic and Keeper of Mysteries
Teach me to see the magic in all things
Help me to move between the veil, allow me to walk among the worlds.
May I glimpse in your forge of dreams
By Seidhr rune-wise and true as words from your tongue.

Hail Goddess of Beauty, Amber laden Creatrix, Mistress of Brisingamen
Ignite within me the creative spark
Help me to bring beauty into my own deeds and all that I make
May the fierceness of your eyes lend me their keen awareness
that I might see none other than your face before my work
Let me be ignited with Need-Fire, your Will. 

Don't Let Them Silence You from Galina Krasskova

Had to share this lovely message from Galina Krasskova to me and her readers.

I commented on This Post about "LARPing pagans" yesterday and was so inspired by Galina's response that she also turned into a blog post on Gangleri's Grove.

I commented:

“This is something I’ve been contemplating and railing against for a lil while now since having this discussion in a local heathen group with a man who compared devoted polytheists to “crazy shithouse rats.” May people I come across in this and other online pagan communities are “Pagan/Heathen Atheists” or similar titles. When I bothered to ask a few why they were part of a religious community when they didn’t believe in the gods venerated therein, they said they liked the idea of the culture and bringing back a lot of the community beliefs of the “vikings” and other similar groups. I then asked if it would not be better for them to join a living history or reenactment group than to profess a religion that they did not believe in. The conversation spiraled downward from there into a complete mess but in the end I had to ask myself – why is it that so many people want to LARP or cosplay as a religion they don’t believe in really? I cannot fathom anyone dressing up as Jesus or Mohammed and going to church but claiming atheism or even going so far as to call everyone else there crazy for actually believing.

This is an issue I still have problems not getting emotional over and am not sure how to grapple with it other than to just avoid the conversation with role-players and keep to my devotions by myself. Glad to see this being discussed elsewhere.”

My response, and I say this to each and every one of you:

This. I see this all the time. First of all, don’t let them silence you. That is what they want. Do not yield an inch. THEY are the ones who have zero place in our traditions. Why the fuck these people think they ought to come into our religion, corrupt and destroy it I do not understand. But don’t fall silent. Speak about your devotion. write about it. do not hide it. that’s what people like this want. Live it and share it and let it grow. That is the only answer to this, because we are faced with a sad influx of people who cannot see what is good: our traditions and faith without seeking to bring it down to their level and corrupt it. Thank you for what you are doing. Keep it up and keep asking those questions.

Also note that these people cannot just come into our traditions and enjoy them and participate as guests. They have to insinuate that devoted people are crazy and try to change the tradition, demand that the tradition changes to accommodate them, rather than the other way around which is at the very least, a complete violation of frith.